Satan’s Role in Music: In Defense of the Devil

Satan. I’m sure you’ve heard of him. Cheeky chappy isn’t he? Tempting Christ. Tempting Eve. Tempting you. He’s a real meddler alright. But not just in biblical matters, many believe Beelzebub’s got his grubby red hooves all over our music industry. Satan has scattered clandestine symbolism throughout mainstream chart music. These subliminal messages are manipulating our thoughts, controlling our collective cognizance, and causing us all to commit lurid acts.

It’s all here people. It’s happening.

Turn on the radio right now to hear the Devil himself coming in your ears.

It’s time to wake up.                                               Now I am awake.

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The Most Offensive Show on Earth

Mary Whitehouse, a devout Catholic and righteous campaigner of broadcast media is an important figure in British history. She thought the BBC was at the centre of a “conspiracy to remove the myth of God from the minds of men”. Her ‘Clean Up TV Campaign’ manifesto claimed that the BBC diffused “the propaganda of disbelief, doubt and dirt… promiscuity, infidelity and drinking”. The CUTV Campaign instead argued that the BBC should “encourage and sustain faith in God and bring Him back to the hearts of our family and national life”.

CUTV campaigned against a variety of shows. Many of which were not what one would immediately interpret as offensive.

Doctor Who was described as “teatime brutality for tots”. A catchy title I think you’ll agree. But a bit much. Doctor Who is somewhat sinister perhaps. But brutal? Brutal?! The Rape of Nanking was brutal. Stagnant cyborgs and ring-modulated voices are not.

But that was then, and this is now. Different people ageing in different times. What offended us 40 years ago is unlikely to offend us now. Opinions and attitudes change change with the times.

This generation. My generation. What does it take to offend us? Are we even capable of being genuinely offended by media? Exactly what on-screen atrocities would we have to witness in order for us to take umbrage and write an angry email to Ofcom?

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Nonsensical Desensitisation Sensationalism

Penetration – thrust at us from all directions.

We cannot bypass this piercing perforation.

Be it savage evisceration or venereal infiltration.

We cannot escape this cultural condemnation.

It makes you sick doesn’t it? Not my inadvertent verse, but the poison plague that coats our culture. The sex! The violence! It’s in the games we play. It’s in the music we hear. It’s in the TV we watch. It’s the reason this country’s gone to the proverbial pooches.

Sex and violence – makes you sick doesn’t it?

Actually no. No it doesn’t. Perhaps it should. But it doesn’t. Permeating our TV listing, consoles and radio-waves until we’re at saturation point, we absorb so much violence we don’t even know it’s there. A man could be strangled, seared, smothered and smouldered on my OLEDHD3D1080p screen and I’d barely process his passing. Why? Because we’ve been desensitised.

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Must Obey Apple

Hey you. Yes you. I wanna sex you up. DUM? DUSL? IF/IB?

Sorry. That was awfully forward of me wasn’t it? In future, would you like to prevent the distribution of these sickening, sexual slurs?

Fear not fascist parents of the free world – there’s an app for that. Once again it’s Apple to the rescue. For never again shall we be exposed to the toxic indignity of forbidden inflections and the radioactive sickness of sexual syntax. Thanks be to Jobs. Amen.

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